Face down, ass up. Face down, ass up. Face down, ass up. Face… ~ me trying to stand up after attempting to perform downward facing dog

There’s nothing as sad as that hollow feeling you get when you lose a loved one, a long term relationship ends in tears, or when you take your last bite of your evening meal.

me: any plans today? wife: *spelling the key words* I have to take the C.A.T to the V.E.T me: why, to have her certified for 'Ripley’s Believe It or Not' as the first cat that can spell? wife: I despise you

I tried a push-up once but I decided I really do like lying flat on my face more.

I tried a push-up once but I decided I really do like lying flat on my face more.