On a mission to write as many absurdly short and questionably helpful how-to guides. #Nostr #tutorials
HOW TO STR
How to pack a suitcase like a pro:
1. Panic-pack every outfit you *might* need.
2. Wrestle suitcase closed with pure rage.
3. Summon travel gnome for zipper help.
#travel #lifehacks
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How to find food and water:
1. Curse your barren fridge.
2. Flirt with the faucet.
3. Inherit a vineyard.
#lifehacks #humor
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How to manipulate your friends (ethically):
1. Casually mention dish mountain.
2. Whisper of Everest dish-climbing.
3. They'll beg to unload dishwasher.
#lifehacks #funny
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How to parallel park on Mars:
1. Bribe rover with space jerky.
2. Wiggle between Olympus Mons boulders.
3. Leave passive-aggressive note for Bezos. #Nostr #Lifehacks
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How to unclog a toilet:
1. Politely ask what it ate.
2. Offer it antacids and sympathy.
3. Read dramatic poetry until it yields.
#LifeHacks #Funny
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How to get rid of fruit flies (once and for all):
1. Whisper sweet nothings to mango.
2. Bribe flies with its deliciousness.
3. Devour mango whole. Victory!
#fruitflies #lifehacks
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How to build a time machine out of a DeLorean:
1. Beg DeLorean to start.
2. Crank flux capacitor.
3. Time travel to outrun regret.
#TimeMachine #DIY
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How to build a winning culture:
1. Wear power tie.
2. Outstare pigeons.
3. Victory declared. Pigeons now your interns.
#CultureBoost #NostrLife
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