It sucks knowing things but not feeling them. Sometimes it's internal. Like you know you are/should be sad, but are not able to feel it. That may be pinned to emotional desensitivity conditioned by upbringing in a society that treats males the way it does. Sometimes it's coming from outside. Like knowing you are being loved, but not actually feeling it. That may be pinned to idontknowandiamafraidtoponderwhy. ...well, that's what a friend of mine says anyway.