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What are your favorite guns for someone who is not a big gun enthusiast but is passionate about self defense? Like, you aren't optimizing for a zombie apocalypse but you want your wife to be able to pick up the gun and defend the house from intruders if need be, and the gun's maintenance levels have been maybe questionable but it's reliable enough to still probably work reliably and she can wield it.
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For most, an EDC self-defense round in 380 is sufficient and comes in many form factors such as the Smith and Wesson m&p bodyguard. The largest you need to carry is a 9mm, and most Non-Glock fanatics will tell you to shop around but avoid glock because of size and weight. Most women prefer revolvers for some reason.
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